Watch Out For The Big Girls....

It can be hard knock life on the dating scene if your a thick girl because guys act like they don't want a big girl in public but they want to lay up wit a big girl. *Let me back track most men....they're are some straight up brother who can appreciate a real women in curves. However in DC, the land of materialism and show stopping....the decents ones want these video/model chicks. It goes both ways because I do like a 6ft and better brother and tend to date the slim jim type...maybe I should show the big poppas some love and get me a little teddy bear to keep me warm....hmmm...things to ponder. Thick brothas and sistas need love too!

Why are men/women so caught up on the superficial? Is physical appearance really that important at the end of the day?

Watch out for the big girl

Black Bachelorette

So after watching the Bachelorette and any other reality dating show maybe the key to me meeting a suitable "suitor" in the District of Columbia is to have a reality show...but since the likelihood of that happening is slim to none...Maybe I will just host a fake audition for hot guys for some new dating reality show then after I meet a cutie with a job....say the show is cancelled....LOL!!! I guess that is building a relationship on lies but that would be FUN.....WHOSE WITH ME?

Your thoughts??????

Bridezillas

I don’t know if many of you are all familiar with the WETV show Bridezillas…its hilarious yet depressing. So I was watching it on Sunday and I realized that these women have serious emotional and mental issues and they were about to Jump The Broom so to speak. WHOOOOAAA!!!! Even though its reality TV I am a completely sane, emotionally and mental stable….and sexy so why do I find myself booless in DC lol…what is wrong with that picture? All in All its great TV and kind of makes you feel better about yourself….I know that’s wrong.

* I do recognize that the divorce rates are high for this very reason

Episode 7 Freakout Moment - Featured - WE tv Videos - WEtv.com

Bridezillas Episode 7 Freakout Moment - Featured - WE tv Videos - WEtv.com

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Let Me Buy You A Drank

The problem is Aint Nobody buying no drinks anymore. Maybe its just me…Maybe I am getting older and look as though I can afford my own drinks….Maybe it’s the Recession. But what happen to the days when a sista could go to the club with no money and was guaranteed a free drink. The days when you didn’t even have to give out her number…just have a light convo for a long island. Man, it used to be nothing for my girls and I to go out and get free drinks from guys who just wanted to seem like they were ballin. Let me be the first to say I miss u fake balla guy….we need you now more than ever. The only way I can get a free drink is say its my birthday or go with one of my homies. I know its hard times but if you can’t stunt in the club and buy me and my girls drinks what r u living for? This ran across my mind last night while I was in out and I know its IGNORANT…tomorrow we will be back to our regular scheduled program!

What do u think?

Sugar Daddies/Cougars

Why Lord Why do Men over 40 insist on trying to date young girls!! It is not cool...to make it plain....its a Flag on the Play!!! My girl was in the gas station and Gramps asked her "How old do I look" Being nice she said "40" He gave her a full on sensual hug (not the respectable church hug) and said "Thank you cuz I'm actually 50"......TIMEOUT!!! Don't be tryin to cop a feel Rufus!

I'm not saying there is anything wrong with having a Sugar Daddy or Cougar...Do You Boo. Hopefully they giving you whatever you like and not one of them busted O.Gs with 7 kids. I do understand that there is a significant learning/maturity curve for guys. If a guy was born before '77 I can't get wit it. Being Live at 25 I would date a guy about 5-7 years older than me beyond that it kinda freaks me out.

What do you think about Sugar Daddies/Cougars? What is the oldest you would date a person?

Bug A Boo

So its not just the ladies experiencing dating woes in the DMV. My homeboy told me he met this young girl around 20 (he is 24) at a neo soul concert. She was peeping him and followed up with her girl later about him. Well they exchange numbers and go on an initial date. So he said the date was alright but she was a little pushy. Well he told her the next day he would be really busy and to make a long story short she called him 6 times and 4 texts the very next day. After about the 3rd call he picked up and told her he was busy and she called 3 more times after that. Based on the Bug A Boo tactics she pulled he ended up telling her they should be just friends further crushing her dreams and she proceeded to still call. I told him at this point he needed to go into No Response Mode!

I think we can all agree that was TOO MUCH!!! Or to give her the benefit of the doubt maybe because of the booless epidemic she didn't know what to do when she peeped a decent guy. Nonetheless, first rule of the game is to never appear desperate (I often use my art of war tactics when dating...lol). But it raises a good question how much do you expect a person to call you when you are in the getting to know you phase or full out dating?

When I am dating a person I expect to speak to them at least once a day(not several) it doesn't even have to be a long drawn out conversation it can be just a simple "hey how r u doing"...is that too much to expect? I don't think so but what do you think?

No Response Mode

* WARNING: When used properly No Response Mode is Guaranteed to keep away all Douchebags, Scrubs, Losers of all sorts. Patent still pending approval.

Every now and then a guy slips pass all of the flags you’ve thrown and you decide to date/talk to him. I find in my case this was mostly out of loneliness or boredom….DMV gets very dry at times hence the blog. I find that it doesn’t take long for them to mess up….like you find out their crazy, don’t have hopes or dreams, have a girlfriend or my pet peeve….no opinions about anything (is it wrong to want to have decent conversations or intellectual debates….I didn’t think so( that’s a whole other topic for another day). It's harsh but true hence the PANDEMIC. All in All you find out the person you’re dating is a douchebag so you have to get rid of them but they have your number and insist on calling.

Here is how you handle this first you can tell him that its not working out for you or your too busy to focus on a relationship….you know we have all the excuses down to a science like the classic “its not you its me speech” and then you put them on no response mode….that means you don’t call them, you ignore their calls, texts and emails. I find this to be even more effective than the speech because everyone understands that ignore button. The key is you have to be consistent and cutthroat. Men are resilient and masterful. They will play along and not call you until some random day three months later….I’ve even known guys to call up to a year later talking bout how they have changed and want to start anew….that is totally up to you. I know when I place someone on No Response Mode there is no coming back. If so you have to come back extra strong.

In addition No Response Mode is also a great way to get over an ex…..oh I have used it and found that it can work as quick as 3 days….u know anything can happen in 3 days….Jesus rose from the dead for Christ sake *(I apologize in advance if that was offensive to anyone) .

Overall, I highly recommend No Response Mode for dealing with Douchebags it‘s proven and effective!!!

Using Fake Names/Childhood Nicknames in the Club

We have all done and we have all heard it....someone using a fake name or going by their childhood nickname in the club. Here is a scenario that just played out last week when I went to the bar:
Random dude: You need to give me ur phone number
Me: What? I don't even know u.
Random dude: My name is Worm
Me: (Puzzled look) Huh? What is on your birth certificate?
Worm...lol: Romeo but they call me Worm because of my dreds and its short for Wormhead
Me: I'm good Worm...u have a good night.

* This convo could also be filed in worst pick up lines

Now I try to give my brothers a chance but if you are over 21 you can't be going by these childhood or random nicknames in the club. I can't take you seriously....I'm talking PeeWee, Boo, Boogey, NuNu, Knuck Knuck, Young Anything...none of that. It's 2009 fellas time to be on your grown man and it starts with giving your real name in the club.

Now Ladies we do this too. You all know how it is, you and your girls riding in the car on the way to the club deciding what your names are going to be for the night. You all have to agree on the names and practice it so everyone knows. I could never do it especially if I had a few sips....one of my girls would be calling some random name and I wouldn't respond. So I always opt to use my real name. So ladies leave the fake names for the youngun's its 2009 if you don't want to give the dude you name just don't talk to him....problem solved why go through all the trouble.

What do you think about this subject? Do you prefer to give out a fake name/go by your nickname in the club....if so why?

Flag on the play

So my new thing is to tell guys when they do or say something crazy "Timeout...Flag on the play" (Shouts out to Corey for the phrase). Its hilliarious...try it. Say you are in the club and a guy is feeling all on your booty or talking to you wreckless throw up the T for timeout and say Flag on the play. Then use any call u want you can tell him Holding, Offsides, Personal Foul, Unnecessary Roughness or just eject him from the game all together. Its even funnier if you actually do the hand signals for the calls. Guys are into sports so they understand these terms.

Now on the flipside the guy may have a newfound respect for you and be intrigued that you know ur sports so you have to stay consistent as a referee. If they don't get the point I tell him that's a 10 yard penalty or half the distance to the goal so they can give me some space. They tend to get the point. The look on their face is priceless....its too funny.

So the next time you meet someone you don't want to talk or they say something off the wall simply tell them "Timeout...Flag On The Play"!

Check out this link for a list of calls with the hand signals:
http://www.ehow.com/how_5023776_identify-referee-signals-football.html

Worst Pick Up Lines

Over the past week this is what I was told:

"Why u acting like you don't know me girl? I said "What...How do I know u?" "Girl we used to play dodgeball in high school" I looked at this dude like you can't be serious and in my mind Im like we didn't even play dodgeball at our HS cuz it was hood and that would surely start a fight. So I just laughed and rolled my eyes and he said Im just playing Im a pimp and walked away. He said wait for me here. I moved with the quickness.....What part of the game is that?

What is the worst pick up line u have ever heard or used?

Booless in DC...The Movement

Well when I arrived in DC some 2 years ago I never realized how difficult and hillarious the dating scene would be in the Nation's Capital. It seems as though most men fall into three categories:

1. The "I just want to sleep with you when I feel like it no commitment" guy or "I don't really have a job" guy
2. The "I'm too cool for you because I have an important job and woman are falling all over me" guy
3. The "I'm not sure if I'm gay" guy *

Now I am sure there are other categories but this is what I seem to run into in the DMV. These encounters make for funny stories but can also be depressing as I think about it as an epidemic....no PANDEMIC sweeping the nation. I know that there are good guys out there but one has to admit that in 2009 there is a diminishing pool of available men that do not fit into these categories.

Ur thoughts? What other types of guys do you run into? Men what types of females do you run into?

* Gay man friends are the best to have they provide alot of worthy advice on the dating scene